Monday, April 04, 2011

My Criteria...the measure of a man. { Part 3-Conclusion}

A Balance Scale I

Hey ladies, this is the conclusion to the "Measure of a man" series. I purposely left this last verse out because I really wanted us to think about this one seriously.

vs 11:In the same way, their wives [fn] must be respected and must not speak evil of others. They must exercise self-control and be faithful in everything they do.

It starts with the phrase "In the same way..." what does this mean? Basically we women should be measured by the same standards we have placed before these men!

Ok, we have listed all these criteria for "real men" but let me ask you; do you honestly think you deserve it? As we look for faithfulness, commitment, maturity, discipline; do we see all these qualities in ourselves?

We women need to work on ourselves and stop asking for qualities that we don't have within.

Drive Slowly - People Under Construction Ahead

It is so easy to have a laundry list of what we want in a man, but rarely do we create lists for characteristics we must have in ourselves before going into marriage.

I have met some good men who meet the wrong women and came out the relationship scathed and from their experiences became players. We don't want to be the reason for one less man on the eligibility market.

Bottom line...
1-Work on yourself, be the best you can be,
2-don't ask for qualities you yourself don't have
3-if you don't have the right qualities, see #1

...musings from atop the potter's wheel...


Tisha said...

I am good
I am darned
if i have spent this amount of time working on me to end up with a bozo, it is a boaz for me all the way...

In the midst of her said...

*snap* *snap*...Boaz all the way!

Yankeenaijababe said...

@In the midst of her

Wow!!1 You should write a book on the measure of a man, you sure got the points, loving it. How have you been, your hubby and all?

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Anonymous said...

Loved the series. So spot on. Much to learn.

Ms. Yellow Sisi Unspoken said...

Love love love it all....thanks alot for sharing...everytime i'm on here i walk out with a brand new lesson to take to heart...wonderful series!

oluSimeon said...

thanks a lot for the 3 part breakdown ..

Daughter of Her King said...

It all makes sense....

Why: we ask and desire something we are not even worth. In the end, if we happen to have it, because it above us we are unable to treat it or value its worth. It like saying I want a managerial position without envisioning the responsibilities and accountablity that comes with it, hence when we get into the position we fail to anticipate demands and expectations are high and we either mess it up or be messed in return(God help us).

In a case of desiring a spouse and praying for qualities, it is better to say Lord check me first, do I have the qualities I am praying for. He has to be honest and prudent. Are you honest/prudent. He has to be romantic and thoughtful. Are you romantic and thoughtful? He has to be a leader and take ownership. Are you are a supporter and do you always stand to help out come what may. I think its easy to pray up a perfect man but to pray up oneself and pray for God grace to enhance one's qualities lets just say (I am work in progress and the holyspirit is awesome at directing me).....

Finally, I do think that for all that we desire, couples should pray for the grace to learn and keep learning and grow at the same time. Life is so dynamic and a learning process too, so in all situations and circumstances aim to learn and grow and impact each other positively.

Thanks for the breakdown.. really thoughtful and inspiring.

Apologies for the deep essay, clearly I have a lot too say as