Friday, May 15, 2020

Dear Inthe... How Do I Give Up Sex?.

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Hi, Inthemidstofher

I want to say thanks for the advice a while back when I messed up with my boyfriend, am happy to say my boyfriend forgave me and we are working things out right now......I owe that to u....thanks a whole lot. Inthemidstofher I have another issue I will like to hear your opinion about..

So right now am trying to stop having sex, I want to have a better relationship with God. How do I tell my boyfriend we have to stop, our relationship is long distance there's always that urge when we see each other after a long time. How are we supposed to be intimate without sex, am worried we might not have a relationship or it will just be formal and boring without sex

Close-up portrait of a young couple in love

I really dont know what to do, mere seeing my boyfriend arouses me. When he comes over or I go over does it mean we can't sleep in the same room, does it mean we can't kiss. How is the relationship going to work, we are a long way from marriage can we survive it. Looking forward to your reply
Can I just say I love you.....Yes alot of Homo
What you are doing is amazing
May God continue to bless you
Lover Girl

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Ife.O said...

Hey Inthe..!!!! WELCOME, it's good to have you back. It's been too long :-(

Unknown said...

Good advice as always Inthe.
Giving up sex especially if you have tasted the forbidden fruit is hard and takes takes inner resolve and spiritual strength. You have to decide what's uppermost. God or your boyfriend?
Your decision becomes much easier then.

Anonymous said...


I love this post because it reminds me so much of me. I've been in relationships where sex was included (I was a born again, tongue speaking Christian mind you). I began to get convicted to quit sinning, but my then boyfriend couldn't understand it. Eventually, we broke up.

I said to myself no more sex before marriage...same thing happened with maybe three other guys. I cried and prayed to God to please help me...I always challenged God asking, "is it possible to meet a man who loves you (God) and inasmuch as he's crazy about me, will not touch me just because of how much he loves you (God)"...long story short, I met this amazing man who told me "babe, I love God too much to hurt Him...we cannot have sex until marriage" Is he fine? Yes! Is he smart? Yes! Is there intimacy? YES!!! without SEX! (we set very firm boundaries as well oh!)

We have an amazing relationship, discuss any and everything...we are best of friends. We made our commitments to God before we even met each other and it makes everything way easier. I can honestly say this is my best relationship ever and it's the first without sex!

In a nutshell, there are MEN who are willing to wait and love you as God intended. Men who will pray with and for you. Nothing and no one should ever take the place of God in our lives.

Be encouraged.

E' said...

OK mama I just may disagree with some points here.
All I got for you is love so I'm speaking in L O V E...
You know how you always say in most letters to you that you would like to give the person counsel like your sister, basicaly meaning you will tell her the hard truth?
I think you are trying soooooo hard to b careful so you didn't quite 'sister her with the hard truth'

Proper inthe... style.

Tough love, yup she may not swallow at the time but ultimately, she wil.

Sister, my prayers are with you. I pray you take the hard way ou and let the relationship slide and pursue God fully. Should He bring ya'll together again, yaaay. If not, God will bring you someone better who will wash you with the water of the word and respect and honor you and your body while encouraging you to do same.

A relationship that is founded on sex has a very very weak foundation.

OK dazall

Lol Inthe no vex for me ooo